Be Nice!

Few people at work couldn't follow my dry subtle humor, they thought i was being mean to them. They knew it was all in good humor, but they couldn't believe i would be brutally honest about few things. 

One day, I decided to tone it down my subtlety and left a HUGE post-it on my laptop to remind myself, to 'Be Nice',  for 2 maybe 3 days it worked. Then i thought i'll pass it to the the guy next to me, on whom i rubbed off some of my humor and he was starting to be little honest too. 

After few days, that guy felt i needed it back, and gave me the same post-it, except the day i came to work, i saw another post-it next to it, saying - "Be extra nice", I cracked up laughing when i entered 5100 and saw it. Apparently, another girl in the room thought i needed the extra dosage!

It's a constant reminder now. Love you babes! 

Bon Appetit!

Joe, the chef in café, and I are friends of sorts. I like the food he whips out and I mostly end up at his kiosk, so he got used to seeing me and I got used to telling him how I liked my lunch. For the past few weeks I didn’t get a chance to head to café and ended up at vending machines, soup cans, friends bringing me lunch and all that.

After a long break, I headed down to café today and he was so pleased to see me, he came out of his kiosk and walked to the one where I was at, cooked lunch for me, while he was grilling my chicken, we had a lovely chat about family, love, life, divorces, work. Apparently after 20 yrs of being married, he separated from his wife.
As he was wrapping my lunch with extra condiments, he asks me “Are you from the city?"
Naah...i replied.
"Has to be New York, then?”
I smiled and asked “why, do you think that, Joe?”,
Naah….you have THAT city spunk, like a NY girl!
I couldn’t help but laugh it off. Spunk huh!

He cooked an extra steak of chicken for me, and added the hot sauce just as I like it.

His well grilled chicken sandwich for a city gal was yummy (as taran says yummy in my tummy). It brought a smile to me as i thought of our candid conversation. Thanks Joe!

How American are you?

I'm not a efficient grocery shopper. I buy only what i need and what i see will be used. Even if the bread i so like is offering the second one free, if i buy one, i woulnt pick it. The guilt that i'm contributing to wastefully wasting food doesnt sit well with me. The other day, i was at the store and picking potatoes, very clearly it said, Buy One, get the other bag free. I gracefully walked away, but the guy who was stocking the bananas next to me, saw that i was walking away with out my free bag of spuds, and felt free to tell me that i shouldnt forget the free bag.

Instead of trying to explain my stance, running short of time, i reluctanly picked my extra bag of potatoes. So now i ended up with 10 pounds of alu, by god! i barely go thru the 5 what was i goign to do with the extra 5.

The next day, i shamelessly offered my friend, that extra bag of it. As much as she appreciated, she was curious, why was i bringing her some vegetable. Now that i had time on hand, i explained to her the best way i could, that i'm not too big on taking the second bag of a vegetable or bread - which i just paid for the first one. How am i to consume all of it. I've let many such deals go past me in the past, this isnt the first time - Cheese, bread, cookies, softdrinks.

A guy with last name Hamm, overheard our conversation and said, "Now, that is very un-american!"...Ha! bite me - was going to be my reply, but i smiled and shrugged.

What would you do? 

Ghalib in my life....

Di-e-nadaan tujhey hua kya hai

Akhir iss dard ki dawa kya hai

Humko unse wafaa ki hai umeed

Jo nahi jaante wafaa kya hai ....

When my sister was seriously ill and we all flew to see her in Melbourne, few years ago, I remember walking down the halls with a 2 month taran in tow, up and down the hall. Because, the nurses wouldnt allow a infant in the ICU. So between me and my mom, my dad, we would take turns nursing, napping taran, changing him everything in the hospital. All this when we werent caring for my brand new nephew Asad.

But as my sister got better, she was changed to a maternity section, we noticed by the end of every week, Jijju or I would be running to the store to buy the infant formula, one day, lunoo said, how come the formula is running out so quickly, shouldnt it be lasting for over 2-3 weeks the least, a visiting friend Cherrie wondered maybe they are using the formlua for other kids in the ward. To that my dad replied, if then it's all going to the right use, so what if it's not just our baby.

Something about that struck with me. He saw through the most simplest form of things. During dad's ...... a blind man from VJY came by to give respects. How did he know dad i asked, oh well, he's the only man who'd buy me tea and biscuits when he was passing by. They both grew to know each other and befriended.

While driving back home the other day, I was heavily reflecting on few incidents and felt, Greatness is in the simplicity of life. It comes in recognizing and acknowledging the simple acts of life, the kindness, the courteousness, the patience in the most impatient of times, the grace - there lies the true greatness the people are remembered with and of. One can be the most intelligent Astronaut, a scientist, top bureaucrat - but it all only comes to life only when traits of simple nature reflect in thoughts as well as actions happen.



My all time fave song. there is no link to my title and my blog, lol, but i'm so in love with my dad's collection of Ghalib's cassettes that i sneaked from his dear music ensemble. Love you baba, i want you to know that i miss you terribly.

The Noir ones

Few weeks ago, i saw Gulaal. The movie takes you to so many levels of lives that you may or may not come across. But the dark beauty of that movie can leave you with many questions. I dont know, for many weeks i've been trying to come up with right sum of words to express and am falling short of it. He has his own genre, one has to dig deep in their own worlds of parallel lives, to come up with such brilliance. His characters justify the essence of sacrificing unapologetically others sentiments for their self interests.

I think i got introed to Mr. Anurag Kashyap by the way of - hmm...was it "No smoking"....John abraham finds himslef in the midst of Russian military, i think, in a bathtub, in the middle of nowhere in snow...the abstractness and the eccentricity of the movie....made me fall in respect with Mr. K. Dev D is another one of my fave.

My first taste of offbeat movies that i can remember of is Salaam Bombay by M. Nair. I could never shake it off even to this day, the way, the pimp, Nana Patekar, whips his belt out and starts hitting the floor where the street kid w/ chai is standing. The sheer power that ass is feeling by exposing the helplessness of the kid - gives me quivers even to this day. ( ha i found the vid).



Some of my other fave movies of this genre are: Mandi, Hazaaron Khwaishey Aisi, Bazaar, Paar, City of Joy, Ardh Satya, Mirza Ghalib, Tamas (on DD, on sundays i remember watching this with my baba, after this he'd take me on his scooter to the market in RJY to buy veggies and meat.), another one,  Cant remember the name of the movie but Girish Karnad is the landlord and shabana azmi ends up as his mistress, Mirch Masala - uff the list is endless. What are your fave's?

Valentine!

Ooh…valentines is around the corner.

Sweet surprises, tender admirations, cute first’s!

Asking that “special one” out, hoping “that special one” takes you out, the sweaty palms, the shy looks, sneaking in, sneaking out, and fibbing to parents! Wondering if you are thought of or not….wandering away in dreams….I'm a closet romantic, shh...

For many vowed down couples, who are totally uninterested in tackling this day, it’s quite a refuge to go to work and sift through the day without any hassles.

Curiously, I asked my friends around what are they planning for their valentines…

FIRST: One says, oh well, I’m going to Boscov’s to return something, I have 15 mts to shop, so whatever I find in fifteen mts for him is what he’s going to get!

SECOND: He has ordered dozen roses and made reservations for dinner at a fancy restaurant. Yaawnn….fine, whatever, do what everybody else does?

THIRD: this guy is taking his girlfriend for a helicopter ride. What can I say about that, he’s setting his bar too high for the rest of his valentine days to come.

FOURTH: A newly married guy- says- he actually went to his wife and said, what I’m going to say in unromantic, but there’s this deal, instead of doing roses and dinner and all, I’ll buy you a purse that you like. A WHAT- I ASKED- A PURSE?? Ok then….She actually liked his idea!

FIFTH: He’s taking one of his three girlfriends out for dinner and musical theatre. What about the other two…still in works he replied.

SIXTH: This guy is blessed with a pregnant GF- when I asked him he went on and on about his monthly expenditure of alimony, a big boat and all. I’m sorry I asked. But I know he’s the nicest…I’m sure he’ll pull something off.

He later on shared, that sometimes while she’s in the shower, he even sits on the b/r floor and talks to her. All the girls in the room, just echoed a sweet “aww….”, he then says, you have to take care of the little things even if you dont want to. HA HA….

WOW! So much for all my valentine stories…

What have you thought of for your valentine? What is your love story?

Hope everyone gets to be with their sweethearts, that person who brings that flame for life, that person who brings that sweet coziness to your life. Love you! As RJ call me “Love you, babes” :)

One of faves, i thought of three, but this one tops! Happy Valentine's Day, dolls and dudes!

Butterfly wings

I just noticed, my shoe has butterflies on the sole....it made me feel like flying, it made me feel want to flap my wings and go....

Makes

Dhobi Ghaat

I loved it. Not everyone gets it, but it's an offbeat movie for bollywood.

AK says "To my muse, my whore and my beloved - Bombay"

Who is your Muse? Ever wondered!

Deep still waters

Jaane kahan kaise shayher

Leke gaya yeh dil mujhey….

Few weeks ago I had this epiphany while sitting in the DMV at Harrisburg. I looked around that huge lobby, there was a mom feeding her baby, few blacks, few mexicans, few desi's, teenagers giggling, old men nodding thier heads of thier incovenience, an old lady going through her bag...I felt so in tune with life, with people around me. I realized that the people around us reflect what we feel inside. Let me change ‘We’ to ‘I’, since this is more of my reflection of thoughts.

Back to it, when I see people doing good deeds, they inspire me to be good, I relate to it, I understand the wanting and the well roundedness it has and the paying forward ripple effects it has. When I see bad people, really the horrible of horrible denominators of life, the murderers, molesters…in literal terms I cant relate to it, but I can understand the drive of where its coming from. The bad in me is not the same as in that person, but at some level of the ladders we intersect at some point.

A mothers need to ignore the spoiled child, a fathers want to protect his child from making a bad choice, a girls emotion of love, a womans helplessness, a mans drive to provide, walking the lines of arrogance, jealousy, feeling stupid, – I feel like the people who walk and talk around us are extensions of who we are.

That’s the right word, extensions.

The people extend our lives, our thoughts, our choices our mistakes, our loves, our deaths, our destinations. Life as a circle moves as whirlwind with all of us in it, there is no start and there is no end. We all live eachother’s lives without the slightest inkling of it.

I as a person might live the simplest of live’s but the most successful one is paying the cost I can’t afford to and I’m compromising on the dreams that the successful person couldn’t let go. In some ways, we both lost and we both win.

The rapist, he/she violate the most valued right of every human being- but we are no different from them, when we make choices that demean the value of life, when I ignore someone doing the wrong thing. When I tolerate intolerable aspects of life, I’m as small a person as the other one is.

I didn’t stand up for the person I most love because she loves the person that hurt her, and I felt so small about myself. I cant shake it off. By letting it go, I tolerated a behavior that is unacceptable and that makes me no better.

The next time, you look around and wonder why people behave a certain way and are quick to judge them. Take a second, think, which part of you do they reflect. Which part of that person resides in you. It wont be the most literal one, but it’ll be in a way that’ll take you by surprise.

I tried explaining this to a friend and it totally went over her head. I chuckled and thought I’ll share here. I’ve also realized, the waters in my head run deep when I’m not chillaxing….

Snowed in

Taran making snow angels leaning on the snow! My raja babylu...

This is my fave, i wish i hadnt messed up my camera at Reheboth, i could have taken some awesome pics. My camera phone did an ok job i guess.

My Patio

this is my second fave, love that tree...just so gracefully standing there.

Spaghetti Notes

The next time you fall off the stairs, and hurt yourself, PLEASE for the love of god, make sure that you are not carrying Taran. I cried in relief on the floor that he didnt get hurt. Thank you shona, for what you did later, you are my true love.

Get the damn microwave fixed. Getting tired of the other one taking up the counter space. hmm...find a new housekeeper.

Button up

After tossing i forget how many clothes, due to lost buttons in the laundry, i decided i'll take matters in my hand.

I frantically searched and found the sewing kit hidden in my closet. Threaded the needle and bingo, the magic of my work!

I was proud that i didnt toss out my work pants and actually mended it back to life. Jeez! Not baad, na....if only i can mend more than a pair of pants.

A what!

As a parent the beauty in parenthood is most reflected in those unsuspecting moments when they say the most darnest thing and you are caught off guard and wonder, hi! whats up with that.

Few days ago since we had winter advisory, i bunked work, i let t take the school off, cleaned the entire house, caught up on laundry, turned on the candles - all this befor ei even finished my chai...and t picks his own breakfast - his cereal- chocolate pebbles and fruit loops.

During his breakfast he says...mamma i want bumblebee, alright dear.
mamma, bumblebee is happy....i'm sure he is doll.
Is he mad, mamma....sometimes dear,
is he sad, mamma....lets hope not, baby!
You are stronger than bumblebee mamma...., no contest there, darling!
Is bumblebee mad at you, mamma...why do you think that bubba!
mamma why is bumblebee not wearing chaddi....what! ha ha ha...we'll have to find out about that, sweets!

Ha ha...what do i tell a little boy smitten of superheroes....it was awesome....he saw me laughing, he broke up laughing....it was a warm moment! love you ! xoxo!

Roz Roz....

When i heard gulzar ji's this line....

ankhon par kuch aise tumne zulf gira di hai
bechare se kuch khwabon ki neend uda di hai

....i fell in love with that line, it made me want to grow my hair longer for some reason....i know stupid huh! but kya karoon, mein kuch aisi hi thodi si crazy hoon...jo bhi...i alwasy thought this was a dimple or rekha song...they have the tresses in the industry to be envied of. The last time i had the longest hair was when i was in my 12th grade last day, farewell day, huge party, decided it was time to grow up by cutting my hair short! Bang on, since then, i've always sported short hair, pony tails etc etc...

this line reminded me of that day, that hair, how proud my mom used to be of my hair....

After many months of growing hair longer, listening to this song on my gulzaar's 15 yr old cassette, friends at work dropping me hints that maybe i'm due for a cut, which i ignored...phir i thought maybe i can give them some life, you know a little trim. Bring some spice in, bring some life back, let my hair feel the air….ha ha….

Anyway, after a lot of running around here and there on sunday, it was like I was on fast forward, somehow I sneaked around time to actually go to the salon. I asked for some bangs….boy did she give me few! Right there in the salon, I could see my natural curls come into action. I was so pleased (to put it mildly), I heavily tipped her, ran to the grocery store next to the salon, flipped my hair left to right, right to left (when nobody was looking) played with it on my way home. V was like, what are you happy about, haven’t you had them all the time, why did you pay someone to give you what you had, well hello, i didnt get curls done....chal choddo...you dont get it...just to see my hair back in life like that, to feel and touch them…it felt so playful.

But this morning was pleasantly surprising, Ooohhh…. you look sophisticated, flirty, professional, very pulled together…this person i work with pinged to say the shirt looked good on me….arrey wah! No, doll, the best thing i do when i get a compliment unfortunately is ignore them, smirk and say something wierd! Thankfully, I’m not the one to be easily flattered, a thing that most virgo’s inherit. (I cant vouch for all virgo's)

Choti si dil ki uljhan hai ye suljhaado tum....
jeena tho sikha hai markey, marna sikha tum....

kya baath hai...what a line...my playlist totally rocks! xoxo...

Going in circles...

Last sunday night, Taran’s clothes for his school are picked out, his sleeping bag, blankie, all packed, his lunch menu planned all set for Monday, my work clothes put out of the closet, ready for first day of school and my work.
Monday morning, got up ahead of time, T’s lunch packed, my lunch packed, fed, changed & dropped him off at school, couldn’t reach mom on the phone, ate my b’fast on route, traffic is light, heard bin tere twice and I’m actually going to make it work by 8.45, bang on, a thought hits me, I look at my back seat….fuck fuck fuck! Crap! Hell no! where the fuck is it! what...my freaking laptop.

I forgot my work laptop at home.

I’m 7 mts away from work and 45 from home, and I realize I drove to work w/out my laptop. I called to find if I could get a loaner. Not today, I was informed.

So you can imagine my impatience and my crankiness.

Oddly, on my drive back home, i found all this ironically super humorous. I just couldn’t help laughing at myself. By god! I had everything planned, yet, the most unimportant kind of silly stupid stuff happen to me all the time. All this non-consequential, irrelavant stuff seem to happen in my life.

An hour late-r, as I enter the conf room, TC asks me, so do you remember where you parked your car? with a smirk on his face. Gadha, ullu, stupid, duffer- I told him…this is not the time, dude.
 
On another note, my stupid friend Moddu, is going on a road trip all by himself, on his scorpio, and i'm so green with envy. I wanna go too...i wish....i wish that he....doesnt forget anything...